My brother died today.

I'm in a dreamlike state... nothing seems real.

I'm grateful that I know how much he loved me though, and continues to love me.

Everything is going hard. Its hard to support my family when I'm so damn numb.

Its difficult primarily because I don't want to cry ....

When my uncle died, I didn't cry either, and I feel like I've been cursed. I can't cry for others since then.

I'm so empty.